“Goalkeepers, to quote the great Brian Glanville, are different, and this is a theory which expands far beyond the mere otherness of their stock in trade. To define the goalkeeper as the sort of person who may – thanks, John Burridge, thanks a lot – may hang a metaphorical “You don’t have to be mad to work here but it helps” sign in the netting of their goal covers only one aspect of the lot of their job. Goalkeepers are the only people on the pitch who spend most of their match standing around doing very little apart from shouting and treading down imaginary divots in the grass and they are, of course, the only ones that are legally allowed to use their hands, but we are not concerning ourselves with such trifling matters here. Goalkeepers dress differently, and they have done since an amendment to the laws of the game in 1909 made them wear shirts that were either red or royal blue, with green being added as a third option three years later.” twohundredpercent