“Here’s a quick one for you: what do Alexander the Great, Josef Goebbels, William Blake, and Keith Southern have in common? Their personalities and abilities are all combined within Henry Winter. Or Paul Hayward. Or Patrick Barclay. Or whoever else you care to mention that lives that dream, the important role of god of war – controllers of information, directors of foot-soldiers in the great struggle, inquisitors, commissars, and giants among men – the football journalist.” Surreal Football